Tuesday, January 9, 2007
A little insight from a lunatic
It occurred to me this evening- I must be living in another mental world. Here's the deal. I am a behavioral perfectionist. I expect myself to be perfect, I expect those closest to me to be perfect. And now, I expect my two toddlers to be perfect. Wait a minute. Stop right there. What the heck am I saying? What am I doing? It's bad enough I expect this of myself. Then Barry, but a ONE YEAR OLD and a TWO YEAR OLD???!!! Yes, its true. This came to me when I was lamenting about the difficult day that I had today. You see, I expect a perfect day. And when its not, my whole day is tainted and sometimes even ruined. You might think- if I lowered my expectations just a TAD, I might have a happier kind of day. You might think that. It seems, in this particular lucid moment, that I am setting myself up for frustration- and certainly annoying those around me! In this lucid moment, there is just no way that any of us are perfect and I should just cut everyone a break. I mean really. There is only One that is perfect. And it aint me. In this lucid moment, I should wake up tomorrow- know that I am going to have frustrations a'plenty and deal with it. But tomorrow morning, lunatic Linberger will arrive and will expect my children to do everything perfectly, respond perfectly, and be perfect. I need help.
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2 comments:
Amen sister! You've read my mind and expressed it very well. I struggle with this often and keep trying to remind myself...do I want my kids to remember a childhood that includes a screaming banshee of a woman trying to make everything perfect or a fun, loving Mom who rolled with the punches and did as much as humanly possible to make our family run smoothly? Easy to say, hard to do! Hang in there!
I believe I also have this disorder. See: folding fitted sheets.
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